Tehilla Luttig Presents

You Keep Hoping This Year Will Be Different.

You tell yourself next time you won't overextend yourself.
Next time you won't say yes to everything.
Next time they'll help more.
Next time you will be more supported.

But it's next time now.

Have you noticed how you're bracing for the visitors / trip? Prep talking yourself to 'just hang in there - it's only a few days'
The overthinking about how to navigate everyone's likes, dislikes, and moods.
The mental chess game of who needs what and how to keep everyone happy.

You're exhausted before it's even started.

You try harder. You do more. You bend further.

And still - it's not enough.

The problem is that you're not even there in the first place.

When you bend over backwards for others, they can't see you.

The Truth We Don't Really Realize:

Resentment often isn't a them problem.

It's often from abandoning ourselves over and over in an attempt to keep the peace.
Or not be "too much."
Or because we think we're not allowed to have needs. Coping strategies we learned as kids, that are no longer serving our relationships.

Every time we:

• Say yes when we mean no
• Swallow our needs to avoid conflict
• Manage everyone's emotions but our own
• Smile through something that hurt you
• Disappear into the background to make room for everyone else

We're not keeping the peace.

We're teaching people we don't exist. We are here to serve their needs.

And the resentment? It builds. Quietly. Slowly.

Until one day we realize we don't even want to be around the people we love most.

That's not love. That's erasure. And resentment is showing us where our boundaries are needing attention.

Here's What We Actually Need:

Not more to do on our already over-full plates.
Or more guilt or shame for juggling what we're doing already.

We need to understand why boundaries feel so terrifying - and how to set them without guilt, drama, or apology.

We need to know that boundaries aren't punishments.
They're not cold. They're not selfish. They're not rejections.

Boundaries are self-care.
Boundaries are a gift to our relationships.

Because when we protect our peace, we show up as the women we actually want to be.

We keep waiting to be rescued when we hold the key to our freedom.

Clear boundaries don't push people away.
They make love easier.

They let people actually see us.

And they don't mean we need to be the strong one all the time - but they do make it easier to recognize our needs, feel safer having them, and allow those who mean the most to us see who we really are.